if anyone is still reading this blog....

Keeping up with this blog has been hard lately. I apologize to anyone who is still checking in to read this drivel. Not sure why I have had writers block lately - there are always exciting things going on and sometimes I get too busy to even write about them. I like writing this blog, despite the fact that I am a terrible speller, I make up my own rules for grammar, and there are a million more interesting blogs out there - some of them written by friends of mine - I still like to document some things here - if for no other reason than to get them out of my head and to remind myself that I actually have a life.
I haven't been in a play in over a year and that makes me sad. At first it was fine because the last play I did was really hard and took a lot out of me. I even thought I might just be done with the whole thing. Who was I kidding? Are we ever really over our craft? Even if people think it is not good or we don't win any awards? Do I wish I had a skill that was more profitable? Yes - it is a tough life but I guess I am destined to live it.
So I carry on.

Last night Steve P. and I watched a life changing movie - I must advise everyone I know to watch it. It was Spike Lee's film of the Broadway show Passing Strange. It is available On Demand right now before it comes to the theatres. This isn't a new story. It is a coming of age story - but it is told like you have never heard it before - in the voice of the author and composer and his wife. The artists name is Stew - just Stew. What occurred to me after the show was that even if I have nothing new to say - even if it has all been said before - it hasn't been said by me. That's what makes each of our stories different. Even when they deal with the growing pains that we all go thru and share and never stop feeling. Those feelings and self-doubt connect us as humans - but what separates us is the way we express the experience thru what we know - that makes us each unique. After seeing a work like that it is at once depressing and inspiring. I first say "Damn, I will never create anything that spectacular." Then I think "That story has been told but not by me." That keeps me going and motivates me to carry on. To keep auditioning, to write when I can and to do more creative work than I am doing now. Seriously - see this movie people!

I went to the dentist today because part of an old filling and some bit of tooth fell off the back of a molar. This was Friday so that jagged tooth was cutting into the side of my tongue for 3 days until the dentist's office opened back up today. I went into work not knowing if the Dentist could see me and even when I found he could (well he was out of town but his partner fit me in) even when he could I went in expecting them to just file it down and send me on my way. No such luck. I had an old filling removed and got a temporary crown. This was no fun and the procedure took about 3 hours - which was and hour and a half longer than they told it would take. At one point I couldn't help but think "they aren't even working on my tooth are they? They are just torturing me for fun. Nothing takes this long to fix!" Another interesting thing that happened while I was in the chair - under sedation and on gas - I started solving all the worlds problems and then at one point I discovered the meaning of life - but soon realized since I was on the gas I would forget it anyway and as quickly as the insite came to me, it was all gone. But I pulled thru the painful procedure and am now resting comfortably and writing it all down.

So much time has passed since the Lady party that I last wrote about and I haven't talked much about the wonderful wedding - but all is going well. Being married to the right person is a blessing and an honor and a daily happy surprise.

Steve's band played at the National for their CD release party this past Saturday. They were all fantastic. I was so proud of him. I will post pics. Steve also found time this weekend to make an apple pie (you didn't think I was done talking about food did you?) - his first attempt with homemade crust even. It was amazing. I have pics of the pie too but for some reason when I plug my camera into my computer nothing is happening - usually it all downloads automatically - does anyone have any insite on this?